Monday, December 8, 2008

Confessions of a Poser

poser noun
1. a person who habitually pretends to be something he is not

I am a poser. Just thought you should know.

At the beginning of high school I was absolutely obsessed with Nike. I had to have everything Nike Nike Nike. I attended a youth conference service project once wearing a Nike outfit, complete with a Nike wristband. While eating lunch I met a guy who later that night got my contact info (don't worry, he was nowhere near as cute as Josh is). We kept in touch for a little while, and later I found out that the reason he had wanted to get to know me better was because I was all 'sporty' and he liked girls who were really into sports.

If you know me at all, you probably know that I hate sports. I am the least coordinated girl in the entire world. No, really.

So anyway, when I got to college, I decided to change my look. I bought me some awesome skater shoes (they were in style in 2000, guys!) and was suddenly obsessed with shopping only at thrift stores. I wore crazy bracelets and lots and lots of colors. I really liked people to notice me because I was 'unique'. I liked the stares I got as I walked around campus. I realized I had succeeded in my objective when I was invited to a punk concert by a couple of similarly-dressed friends I had made. I turned the offer down because I would have no idea what to do if I actually went to a concert like that!

That's what cool punk people do, and I was only a poser.

After I got back from my mission, all my clothes were out of style, and let's be honest, something you buy from D.I. or Savers will only last so long since it's already second-hand. Then it just starts looking gross. So I decided to start dressing in black.

Why black? I'm not exactly sure. Black is slimming. It is classy. As a musician, I often had to wear all black anyway for my performances. But I think I went a little overboard, as always. I would go shopping and come back with more black clothes. Pretty soon I was well-known for wearing black. Then I dyed my hair black.

Yeah... while I was engaged, our bishop confronted me about it. He said he had been concerned about me, and hoped that I would dye my hair a different color before I got married. Once again, people had begun to judge me (and worry about me!) because of my appearance.

You think that the way you look might not matter. But it does! You are how you dress.

Unless, of course, you're a poser like me.

Epilogue: Yes, to this day I'm still a poser... sometimes I still wear my maternity clothes.


Josh said...

Well it's a good thing I see right through posers. And really liked what I saw with this one.

NoSurfGirl said...

lol!!! i remember the nike thing! In fact....

(ashamed confession here)... Care and I joked about it (and it wasn't just you, it was your whole family) for a while afterward. But truthfully we were a little jelous. We would never be allowed to have something nike! And we had no mall within any driveable distance, either... you guys were cool and we weren't. Sigh.

Anyway, I like you in black. I thought your black hair was very pretty, and so is your brown hair, and that time when you were blond. You're a girl who goes well with all colors... and with black. :)

If it makes you feel better, I think Cait was approached several times by YW leaders and the like about her disturbing tendency to black (and to die her hair colors bordering on extreme) as well... and she is a very good girl, too. SO it must just run in our family! We like to be... well... US. And sometimes it takes us a while to discover what that means.

Sarah said...

Well, I for one like you no matter what you decide to wear. :)

Sam said...

i liked this story alot.

The Petersons said...

Hey, don't dog maternity clothes...I still wear pretty much all of mine-well the shirts anyway. I'm not a poser, I'm just fat. Maybe I'm a fat poser... :)

Justin, Kira and Evan said...

I see nothing wrong with black hair! Heck ... I had blue streaks in my hair for a long time.

Lori said...

So really, i just need to go find you black nike maternity pants from a thrift store and you would be the happiest poser alive?!

Erica said...

I still have a slight aversion to Reebok because you hated it so much!

Camilla said...

I'm taking exception to NoSurfGirl's gall at lumping me with you, Adele. You were the one with the brand name stuff- I was the one who always spent all my allowance on candy. Sorry cous, any cool clothes I was ever wearing must have been borrowed from my older, poserific sister!

NoSurfGirl said...


see. The candy thing. Also made us cousins insanely jealous. :)

I think when it comes to cousinhood, the grass is always grenner... er... on the other side of the orchard fence where delicious oranges hung, ripe for the stealing...